Amazing Will Ferrell impression

if you were a fan of Saturday Night Live you remember this character that Will Ferrell did named "Robert Goulet", gotta hand it to Will for creating this character, so strange and fucked it makes you wonder how he even thought it all up!! but NOW, some genius has been putting up YouTube clips of himself doing an impression of Will Ferrells "Goulet" character. usually i'd be bummed about this cuz how can you improve upon perfection? Well, this guy did it, he took it to the next level, so fucking funny!! Look out Will, whoever this mystery man is, he may be coming for your fucking job!

REAL TALK:ANTHONY WEINER KICKING ASS ON HEALTHCARE REFORM

Although not as popular as 'Tube Top Tuesdays', 'Hot Asian Girl DuJour', Clips from 'The Room' or pictures of babies covered in money; I think it's important to recognize some political game every now and then, -especially regarding the healthcare debate going on in congress right now. I was gonna post my own rant on this yesterday, but I think my new boy Ant Weins sums it up best here:

Baby Stays Paid

Down because of the economy? Keep your spirits up! If this baby can make it, so can you. This infant has at least $300, a Motorola RAZR phone and a gold bracelet. He stays cool by wearing a crisp Grant as a hat. If you can't out-hustle a baby, then hit the bricks pal and beat it because you are going out.

"BITCH, I'M MAKING YOU A SMOOOOTHEEEEE..."

Raaaaaaaandy strikes again!

“THE DaVINCI CODE" BOOK REVIEW-By Jay Money

I have this buddy who was saying that there are descendents of Jesus Christ just walking around the streets right now. Like, you could be sitting on the bus and the person next to you could be Jesus’ great, great, great grandchild. Buillshit, I said. Everyone knows Jesus was a virgin. Him and his mom were both virgins, I said. I’m pretty sure they even talk about that in the bible. I guarantee there’s nothing in the bible saying that dude was out here getting chicks prego. But my buddy was talking about this book called, “The DaVinci Code” that says Jesus had kids. So I got a copy of “The DaVinci Code,” but the shit is super long, so I found this dude at work who said he saw the movie and just had him tell me about it. I guess the main people in the story are following this trail of clues so they can solve this murder and all these religious, secret society dudes are trying to kill them. Then at the end they figure out that this chick is the descendant of Jesus, but she never knew it. I guess that painter DaVinci hid a picture of the chick Jesus was hooking up with in his painting “The Last Supper,” but everybody thought the chick was a dude for a super long time. I guess that DaVinci dude was pretty messed up, though. I heard he drank a shit-ton of absinthe and cut off his ear and sent it to this lady he wanted to hook up with. They sell that absinthe again now, but I don’t think it gets you messed up and makes you hallucinate real bad like that shit they had five hundred years ago. Plus, if that shit really got you that messed up then all the rappers would be talking about it all the time like they talk about that promethazine or lean, or whatever.

NOPE...

Sorry Vikings fans. It looks like you're gonna have to pin your postseason hopes on either Tarvaris Jackson or something called 'Sage Rosenfels' at the quarterback position. Just 2 days before the beginning of training camp, my former boy Brett Favre, decided to remain retired (we'll see) and forgo the opportunity to stab thousands of loyal Packer fans, who supported him during his 16 year tenure in Green Bay, in their collective hearts... Thanks...-I guess. I dunno, part of me was actually kindof looking forward to watching the surreal drama of the whole thing unfold. Kinda like when Hulk Hogan switched over to being a bad guy and thought it'd be a dope idea to dye his gay little moustache black in order to signify the switchover. In the case of Favre, I think things would have gotten really ugly had he suited up for the Vikes, -far beyond my proposed pregame bonfire of all of Green Bay Favre-related Memorabilia when they faced Minnesota on November 1st at Lambeau. Anyways, basically what I'm trying to say is 'Suck it Vikings fans, and may your season be filled with misery and disappointment' (not that you aren't acustomed to this already).

"ENJOY...THE SEASON!" -Mike Tice

SAY NO TO DRUGS!

More breathtaking acting from 'The Room' starring Tommy Wiseau.

SARAH PALIN'S WEEKLY WORD JUMBLE

SERIOUSLY... -What the fuck?

TUBE TOP TUESDAY!

DOW CHEMICALS AGREES TO PAY 12 BILLION DOLLARS REPARATIONS FOR BOPHAL DISASTER

Actually they didn't. Dow chemicals lost 2 billion dollars in 23 minutes when frantic shareholders dumped their dow stocks upon this announcement made by Dow non-'employees' The Yes Men.

OTTY SANCHEZ DECAPITATES HER BABY/ EATS BRAIN (Not a song by the Misfits)

SAN ANTONIO — The scene was so gruesome investigators could barely speak: A 3 1/2-week-old boy lay dismembered in the bedroom of a single-story house, three of his tiny toes chewed off, his face torn away, his head severed and his brains ripped out. "At this particular scene you could have heard a pin drop," San Antonio Police Chief William McManus said Monday. "No one was speaking. It was about as somber as it could have been." Officers called to the home early Sunday found the boy's mother, Otty Sanchez, sitting on the couch with a self-inflicted wound to her chest and her throat partially slashed, screaming "I killed my baby! I killed my baby!" police said. She told officers the devil made her do it, police said. Sanchez, 33, apparently ate the child's brain and some other body parts before stabbing herself, McManus said. "It's too heinous for me to describe it any further," McManus told reporters. Sanchez is charged with capital murder in the death of her son, Scott Wesley Buccholtz-Sanchez. She was being treated Monday at a hospital, and was being held on $1 million bail. The slaying occurred a week after the child's father moved out, McManus said. Otty Sanchez's sister and her sister's two children, ages 5 and 7, were in the house, but none were harmed.
Police said Sanchez did not have an attorney, and they declined to identify family members. No one answered the door Monday at Sanchez's home, where the blinds were shut. A hopscotch pattern and red hearts were drawn on the walk leading up to the house. Sanchez's aunt, Gloria Sanchez, said her niece had been "in and out" of a psychiatric ward but did not say where she was treated or why. She said a hospital called several months ago to check up on her. "Otty didn't mean to do that. She was not in her right mind," a sobbing Gloria Sanchez told The Associated Press on Monday by phone. She said her family was devastated. Investigators are looking into Sanchez's mental health history to see if there was anything "significant," and whether postpartum difficulties could have factored into the attack, McManus said. Postpartum depression and psychosis have been cited as contributing factors in several other cases in Texas in recent years in which mothers killed their children. Andrea Yates drowned her five children in her Houston-area home 2001, saying she believed Satan was inside her and trying to save them from hell. Her attorneys said she had been suffering from severe postpartum psychosis, and a jury found Yates not guilty by reason of insanity in 2006. In 2004, Dena Schlosser killed her 10-month-old in her Plano home by slicing off the baby's arms. She was found not guilty of reason by insanity, after testifying that she killed the baby because she wanted to give her to God. Sanchez's neighbors expressed sorrow and horror Monday at the grisly killing. Neighbor Luis Yanez, 23, said his kids went to school with one of the small children who lived at the house. He said he often saw a woman playing outside with the children but didn't know whether it was Otty. "Why would you do that to your baby?" said Yanez, a tire technician. "It brings chills to you. They can't defend themselves." Allen Taylor, another neighbor, said "once she gets back in her right mind, she's going to be devastated."

THE ART OF FORESHADOWING: THE ROOM

If you've never seen Tommy Wiseau's movie 'The Room', you're blowing it bigtime.

GAYS NEED NOT APPLY... -JUST WHITE SUPREMACISTS. (THANK YOU)

We live in a fucked up backwards-ass country. It's no wonder a large percentage of dipshits can be whipped into a frenzy to vote against their own interests time and time again, -so long as the right mascot tells them to. Think about this one for a sec: Gays are ineligible to serve in the military, even for specialized positions such as translators etc.; yet White Supremacists are all good to become highly trained killing machines... In other words, the United States would rather have self professed NEO NAZIS in the service, than people who happened to be homosexuals. On one hand you have people who consciously subscribe to supremacist NAZI philosophy- the exact philosophy we used our military to fight against in WWII, and on the other hand you have someone who is attracted to people of the same sex. Seriously, what a fucking embarrassment. Until we get our own shit together, we need not invade another country under the guise of spreading 'freedom'.

Army regulations prohibit soldiers from participating in racist groups, and recruiters are instructed to keep an eye out for suspicious tattoos. Before signing on the dotted line, enlistees are required to explain any tattoos. At a Tampa recruitment office, though, Fogarty sailed right through the signup process. “They just told me to write an explanation of each tattoo, and I made up some stuff, and that was that,” he says. Soon he was posted to Fort Stewart in Georgia, where he became part of the 3rd Infantry Division.
Fogarty’s ex-girlfriend, intent on destroying his new military career, sent a dossier of photographs to Fort Stewart. The photos showed Fogarty attending white supremacist rallies and performing with his band, Attack. “They hauled me before some sort of committee and showed me the pictures,” Fogarty says. “I just denied them and said my girlfriend was a spiteful bitch.” He adds: “They knew what I was about. But they let it go because I’m a great soldier.”
In 2003, Fogarty was sent to Iraq. For two years he served in the military police, escorting officers, including generals, around the hostile country. He says he was granted top-secret clearance and access to battle plans. Fogarty speaks with regret that he “never had any kill counts.” But he says his time in Iraq increased his racist resolve.
“I hate Arabs more than anybody, for the simple fact I’ve served over there and seen how they live,” he tells me. “They’re just a backward people. Them and the Jews are just disgusting people as far as I’m concerned. Their customs, everything to do with the Middle East, is just repugnant to me.”

Congrats on having a style name more bad and more retarded than your terrible, retarded music

Crabcore moves

Chiefly among the crabcore musician's repertoire of stylistic gestures is the crabwalk itself, from which the genre's title is derived. The crabwalk is identified by the player's extremely low stance, wherein both feet are set apart from one another as far as possible, while still allowing the player to maintain at least a 90 degree bend in his knees. While in the crab stance, the player then purposefully transfers the weight of his upper body between each leg, achieving a swaying motion intended to have a hypnotic effect among audience members.
Other moves available to crabcore players include;

The 'Richardson Richardson'.
'Krinking'
The 'Beaver Bounce'
The 'Dirty Hamper'
The 'Pestal Press'

I'll grant them "The Dirty Hamper" though. That's gonna blow up fabu-vegas style. Just you wait.

2009 GATHERING OF THE JUGGALOS... WOW...

About 2 minutes into it, my mind started racing trying to come up with some other washed-up quasi celebrities and rejects that they could have included on the lineup, but by the end of the 14-minute commercial, I think they already had them. -All of them. Seriously though; what the fuck's up with the Juggalos? -This shit is bananas! By the end of it I was seriously considering going. I'm just thinking, during those 4 days, you're really gonna see some fucked up shit.(Good looking out Logan 1184)

Punk Jumps Up To Get Beat Down (By Skaters)

Idiot gangbanger pulls a pistol on a kid trying to get his ollie on and gets tore the fuck up. Between the sideways gat gangsta grip and starting potentially deadly beef with some kids trying to skate, this clown deserved to get slapped with a Powell Ripper.

BEST JOY DIVISION COVER EVER

Put A Ring On It

Man, talk about a coincidence. I was just telling my barber that the world was missing a YouTube video of a woman in a ninja suit and psycho clown mask dancing to Beyonce! Too bad it had to end like this, though.

INTRODUCING: LOA's TUBE-TOP TUESDAYS!

I just started trying to get this thing going, and already it's taking the world by storm! That's right people, TUBE TOP TUESDAYS! EVERY Tuesday from now on, demand that every girl wears a tube top in honor of all worthy causes: global warming, racism, feeding the poor, unemployment, the Israel/ Palestine conflict. -Whatever cause you have and whatever stance you take on it, if it's tuesday and you're a woman, wear a tube top. That's the least you could do for world peace right?Jennifer Love Hewitt, down for the cause.

MEDICAL MARIJUANA by: Jay Money

Dude yeah, I was flipping channels today and saw this news show on CNN talking about medical marijuana and how they’re talking about taxing the sales of it to help pay for the California budget crisis, or whatever. All I know is they showed this 70-year-old hippie with braids scooping something labeled Burmese Cush out of an industrial-sized container like he was bagging up some granola at the grocery store. This shit was all gnarled up with all kinds of different blue and purple hairs protruding all over the place like a goddamn spirogyra. Dude, yeah, let me come up on some shit like that. I’ve gotten plenty of chicks naked off some regular-ass weed before, so I know if I had that Burmese shit I could step my game up to some Wilt Chamberlain-type shit, no problem. I mean, I’ve smoked a bunch of different crazy shit before, don’t get me wrong. I smoked some shit called Train Wreck that made me black out, fall down the steps and then have to get a bunch of stitches in my head, but it was nothing like this CNN weed. Then they were saying that LA has more of these medical marijuana places than Starbucks coffee shops. Yeah, how much is a plane ticket to LA? Are you kiddin’? I’ll be dancing the Makarenna and speaking in tongues. My buddy was saying that he smoked some crazy shit in Amsterdam that made him think he was dead. I’m not trying to get that bat shit-ass high. But if I get my hands on some of that LA, CNN weed I do plan on getting pretty super fucking high, though.

HORRIBLE RAP TUESDAY: BROKENCYDE vs. BLACK EYED PEAS -YOU DECIDE!!!!

Ladies and gentlemen, we have a challenger. A few months back, I declared with relative certainty that Brokencyde's 'Freaxxx' was the worst song in all of human history. I say "relative certainty" because I hadn't heard any other Brokencyde songs. That being said, I'm starting to think that I may have spoken too soon; because godDAMMIT, -if the Black Eyed Peas havent laid massive putrid-smelling molten diarhea-egg on this one. I'm baffled folks, I need your help to decide which one is more horribler than the other. Weigh in in the comments section below.
THE REIGNING CHAMP:

THE CHALLENGER: (Make sure you listen to the whole thing because there are lots of horrible tempo changes etc.)

RAAAAAAAANDY!! -PT. 2

Raaaaaaaandy - Part 2 (Funny People) from Aziz Ansari

BIG THINGS

I remember, back in the day, getting amped when I'd see a kid in a Honey Nut Cheerios commercial riding a skateboard... This shit is banannas!

HORRIBLE RAP TUESDAY: BABY VOX - XCSTACY

There's one thing right about this and endless things wrong with this. See if you can figure them out.(Good looking out Kingpin Ronin!)

HOT KEYBOARD CAT T-SHIRT Du JOUR

There's no telling how much money I'd spend on something like this...

FACE TIME ON FOX NEWS WITH ANDREW WK

There is no context for this clip, but don't assume that there's any logical reason whatsoever that Andrew WK is an authority on what's morally acceptable... Then again, Fox news is a magical world where it makes perfect sense to consult Andrew WK on such things.

TODD BRATRUD; KING OF THE NARCS

Wether or not you are a blogger for Lords of Apathy or not, I've gotta keep it real here. Todd Bratrud is a fucking narc. Real talk, just the other day homie was GUSHING over how good Late Night with Jimmy Fallon is. Granted, you might think I'm unqualified to judge him considering I have never seen the show before; but the fact that Jimmy 'world's lamest celebrity' Fallon hosts it, I feel completely justified in my ruling. Todd Bratrud, you are found GUILTY of being a 3rd-degree power-narc. May god have mercy on your soul.

RACIST REPUBLICAN FRIDAY: PAT BUCHANAN

Well, it's official ladies and gentlemen... The Republican party has stopped just short of declaring that they are unapologetically the party of narrow-minded 1950's Jim Crow-era racism. You may be thinking, "What's changed?" as far as that's concerned. Well, not a whole lot. I'm just seeing that since Obama got elected, there is increasingly less and less effort being put into their use of nuanced racist codewords or any amount subtlety in their racism. Before the election, they at least talked around it, and made the effort to try and fool people that they weren't the divisive backwards-ass racists that they have always been. It's strange to think that you can site one specific example and say that it is the official turning point as far as this is concerned, however I think this interview in particular, sheds light on exactly what the modern-day Republican party is all about: -'Rich white men uber alles. -fuck everybody else'..."White men were 100% of the people that wrote the Constitution, 100% of the people that signed the Declaration of Independence, 100% of the people who died at Gettysburg and Vicksburg, probably close to 100% of the people who died at Normandy. This has been a country built basically by white folks, who were 90% of the nation in 1960 when I was growing up and the other 10% were African-Americans who had been discriminated against. That's why." -Pat Buchanan on why 108 of 110 Supreme Court justices thus far have been white.

WALTER CRONKITE 1916-2009 REST IN PEACE

Walter Leland Cronkite, Jr., considered by many to be "the most trusted man in America" has died. The announcement came from his family. Most recently 92-year-old Cronkite had been suffering from cerebrovascular disease. Walter Cronkite anchored the CBS Evening News for 19 years, from 1962-1981. He lent his iconic voice to the broadcast in 2006 when Katie Couric began anchoring the program.

DAVID LIEBE HART FRIDAY: FATHER AND SON

Killin it!

CHEATERS; RED-DOT (not Feather) EDITION

There's nothing like a good old-fashioned, family-style, Indian cheater beatdown. Look out for the other family members padding their stats with extra assists, handing homegirl different objects to beat her husband and his boo with. -Really fucking cool.

LETS PAINT; MULTI-TASKING EXTRAVAGANZA

MUSTSEE TV!

Real Talker of the Week: Harry Alford

Harry Alford, President of the National Black Chamber of Commerce, does not believe that Democratic energy policy is creating jobs. California Senator Barbara Boxer disagrees, citing statements by the NAACP and the "100 Black Men of Atlanta" favorable to her position. Alford explodes and real talk ensues. As everyone knows, when you want comments on energy policy, the first places to go are the NAACP and the 100 Black Men of Atlanta. I heard that Boxer was also going to enter statements from Bill Cosby and Tracy McGrady into the record, but thought better of it after Alford went off.

Brooklyn Funk Essentials

I would guess this has been posted on LOA before at one time or another. I probably should know that as i am one of the oldest living contributors to this fine web-log, but i gotta come clean here... i dont look at Lords of Apathy. there. i said it. dont get me wrong, its a good web-log (from what people tell me), i just have better things to do than to actually look at a blog i regularly post on.

That said, this is worth listening to again even IF someone else posted it just yesterday. 

who fucking cares.

good looks Erica

REPUBLICAN SHIL GLENN BECK (OFFICIALLY) LOSES MIND ON AIR

You think you've heard Glenn Beck being a lunatic before... -Dude!; -you have no idea. Peep game:

AND THE WINNER OF THE GOLDEN GLOBES AWARD GOES TO...

RAAAAAAAANDY!!!

UKRAINIAN IDOL

These guys really know how to party.

RIP Arturo Gatti

Arturo Gatti was strangled to death in his sleep by his stripper wife. Gatti's fights against Micky Ward were brutal epics that will always be remembered by anyone who saw them. After splitting a pair of bouts, Gatti and Ward had a final showdown in 2003 in which Gatti broke his hand in the fourth round but came back to win. I was so stoked after the fight that I hopped in my Camero and cruised Harlem Avenue with the Italian flag out the window. Real talk for a second, this is a rare celebrity death that actually made me sad. It also drives the nail in the coffin of my interest in boxing as Gatti's death reminds me that today's boxers are boring as hell.

On a related topic, does anyone have any stories where dating a stripper in a long-term relationship turned out well? Don't they usually just steal your money/drugs/car or give you an STD?

HORRIBLE RAP MONDAY: THE YOUNG CONS

Who would have thought thought that 2 dorky christian, republican, white guys could manage to suck this ferociously at rapping? Negative 9 mics

VALERIE: AMY WINEHOUSE

Hopefully she stay's alive long enough to record more heaters like this one.

CHIP THE BLACK BOY

Sometimes, certain things are impossibly perfect. David Liebe Hart is a living god.

STRANGER IN MOSCOW

M.J.'s catalog of songs is fucking sick. I've been really digging this one since he passed away. I'll spare you all the sappy nostalgia, but real talk, the man brought an incalculable amount of joy to the world.

RIP AIR McNAIR

A belated Rest in Peace goes out to my man Steve McNair. My sincere apoligies on that, we were all booked up on celebrity mourning last week.

Thursday Caption Contest

Don't let me down, LOA.

UPDATE:

I gotta start hanging out at more G8 summits.

DAVID LIEBE HART (of Tim & Eric's Awesome Show)

STICKY NIPS

NIP-SET, NIP-SET, NIP-SET, NIP-SET!!

TAKE THE SARAH PALIN CHALLENGE!

Fuuuuck.... This in the most retarded, convoluted, incoherent, rambling groupings of words ever assembled. Originally, I was going to challenge our viewers on making heads or tails of what the hell Sarah Palin's talking about in this speech; but since that is clearly not possible, I've downgraded the challenge to actually just listening the whole thing without your brain exploding. Let me know how long you're able to hold out in the comments section below.

SWAGGAPEDIA: A HISTORIC TIMELINE OF THE WORD "SWAGGER" (By Nicky Vecki)

•1569 Charles IX of France made his brother Henry a Generalissimo and presents him with a staff-like swagger stick to signify his appointment.

•1702 "Swagger sticks" evolved from the "leading cane" prescribed for British officers. On parade, this cane was used for leading men. But it was also used administering on-the-spot punishment of up to 12 strokes for minor violations of regulations.

•1800s In the Marine Corps, the swagger stick came into vogue in the latter part of the 19th century, and was a required article of uniform until WWI.

•1981 Jimmy Swaggart began a daily television program entitled "A Study in the Word." The program was aired on over 160 channels throughout the U.S., Canada and abroad.

•2000 "Swagger" is the first full studio album by band Flogging Molly.

•2007 Pop artist M.I.A. releases her song "Paper Planes," featuring the line, "No one on the corner have swagger like us."

•2008 T.I., Jay-Z, and Lil' Wayne release thier hit song titled "Swagger Like Us."

•2008 Old Spice releases an under-arm deoderant called Swagger. Commercials for the product feature rapper-actor L.L. Cool J and NASCAR driver Tony Stewart.

•2008 Soulja Boy Tellem releases his self-titled album featuring the songs, "Booty Got Swag"(Donk Part 2), and "Turn My Swag On."

•2009 Snickerdoodles McPoppycock coins the phrase Swaggerballin'.

•2009 Lil' King releases his Internet hit titled, "I Got Swag."

there IS hope for the future of music...

on this, the day of the Michael Jackson funeral/memorial, i felt the need to post this clip to make sure you all know that the future of music is in good hands. There is no way anyone will ever be able to match the things MJ did for music/entertainment, but i think you will agree that the combo in this clip are picking up very near where Michael left off...

R.I.P. MJ

BEST MUSIC VIDEO OF THE DECADE

Drake "Best I Ever Had" from kwest on Vimeo.

HORRIBLE RAP TUESDAY: RON ARTEST MJ TRIBUTE

Sometimes it's really gratifying to say stuff that an old corny white dude would say: "Hey Ron; don't quit your day job!!"(Good Looking out Playboy Matt)

HORRIBLE RAP TUESDAY: COMBINATION PIZZA HUT AND TACO BELL

Das Racist bringing us the party/ fast food anthem of the summer.(Good looking out Barlow)

DOPE!! -5 HOTDOGS SLATHERED IN DIARRHEA FOR ONLY 5 BUCKS!?

I think the coolest thing about this is, those dogs will look pretty much the same going in as coming out.

IRONLAK SWAGGERBALLERS @ 33 & a THIRD

The photo/video/editing dreamteam over at Supervision has done it again; -another swaggalicious Ironlak promo video to get things crack-a-lactating for the summer. Damn ladies, if you see KC Ortiz, Noah Banks or any of the Ironlak team out on the street, do not hesitate to take them home and bone them immediately. -Chuurch.

( Extra special thanks go out to Playboy Levi, and young Jeremy for making it all possible.)

Least Necessary Rap Song of the Year

When I read the CNN story about The Game's Michael Jackson song, I was expecting a "We Are The World" style tribute to MJ. The Game makes it sound like he broke out the Rolodex and brought everyone from Quincy Jones to Lionel Richie down to the studio. Instead, you get a barely audible Mario Winans and a Boyz II Men cameo. The star power on this track almost melted my laptop. Basically, this is a Game solo record, although Puff makes a brief vocal appearance-- literally phoning it in like Hell Rell at the end of Diplomatic Immunity. Honestly, I'm surprised that Puffy isn't trying to milk MJ's death for cash like he did BIG's (maybe a half-sung joint over an "I'll Be There" loop with a Danity Kane club track on the B-side). Anyway, all profits from The Game's MJ song go to the Jackson family. Considering Michael's estate is worth in excess of one billion dollars, I can't think of more deserving recipients.

TIME LIFE BOOKS PRESENTS: 'THE BUSH YEERS'

Breakroom live is killin it lately.

ROBOGEISHA

Recognize!:

WORSE IS BETTER: THE REPUBLICAN STANCE ON HEALTHCARE (Explained by Sam Seder)

HOW DO YOU TELL THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN SARAH PALIN'S MOUTH AND HER VAGINA?

Only 20% of what comes out of her vagina is retarded.