LORDS OF APATHY

January 10, 2008

HOT ASIAN GIRL Du JOUR: MARI SHIMAMURA

The hardest thing about Hot Asian Girl Du Jour posts is writing something brilliant to accompany the picture. Since my mind is pretty much fried after an all-night laundry and Redbull bender, I'm gonna give one of my lucky readers a chance to make history with our first ever 'Hot Asian Girl Du Jour' caption contest. Ordinarily I'd just pull up some Michael Bolton lyrics off of the www and call it a wrap, but since I want to keep people in the bloggosphere engaged in the blogging process, I am gonna provide this opportunity for you to get your shine on. Post your caption ideas in the comments section below an and I will update periodically update the freshest entry over the next few days. -Good luck to all!
Sincerely, your brother in Christ,
-Snickerdoodles(Click image to get a boner in higher resolution)

The homie ETC just submitted this beautiful piece of prose for Hot Asian Girl Du Jour, and I gotta come clean here, this shit brought tears to my eyes. ETC is a true poet and devastatingly senstive wordsmith.. Read on and let him kill you softly with his song of bittersweet romance...

ETC Wrote:

This is important!
Mrs. Butter's worth it:

You are standing...
Before you sits Mrs. Butter
She is sitting on a pancake
You have both just began a plummet into the red hot depths of a very unhappy volcano

---

Come here
...............................&
contort upon my massive pancake
we descend fastly/surely - true - but ...
surely we fall slow enough for you to come and join me too.

It is soft _ and delicious _
are you familiar with Bisquick?
It does amazing things - Bisquick.

Have you brought the Blue Bonnet, or must we spread your Country Crock upon it? The pancake.

---


You decide to spend your last moments living on the falling pancake with Mrs. Butter.

You Land-o in a Lake of fire.
Mrs. Butter got hotter.

15 comments:

nikkos said...

"Yes they're real...and they're spectacular."

Snickerdoodles McPoppycock said...

well, I applaud your effort, but honestly I would just as soon post some Michael Bolton lyrics if I was planning on setting the bar that low.. You gotta come correct with this shit! -This is prime time baby!! You gotta represent up in this bitch.. Make this caption something people are gonna remember for a lifetime.

nikkos said...

Ouch!

You're right though: no one in the history of these here internets ever had the idea to post pictures of nekkid women before. so original!

Snickerdoodles McPoppycock said...

I wasn't implying all that, I'm just saying, I think we have a chance to make something really special with this thing and I'd hope that we would all take this as seriously as I occasionally sometimes do. This isnt just posting pictures of hot asians on the internet. I like to think of it as creating a symphony of words and images out of a highly accessible digital medium for the entire world to enjoy! so c'mon man, dig deep here -I know you got it in you! -Have you thought about maybe writing a poem for your entry? Just let your creativity run wild!!!

Wagon Burner said...

I cannot think and stare at boobies at the same time.
It's way harder than walking and chewing gum.

freightman said...

This isn't my caption, I'm just taking a lil'minute to ponder your life. While most of the world wakes up and brushes their teeth or goes straight for the breakfast cereal, you saunter out of that redbull induced coma, practically fall down the steps rubbing your allergy eyes and plop right down in that faux leather swivel chair and google "asian, huge breasts" morning after morning. It's a good routine you've got going there.

nikkos said...

i see, and i stand corrected.

i did not immediately grasp the full, shall we say, "thrust" of your artistic endeavor.

therefore, and henceforth, may i suggest that all entries be submitted in the form of a haiku? not only would this be culturally appropriate, there is the added potentiality that the results could be incredibly offensive. what's not to like?

for now, i will leave you with the words of the immortal mcdonald's campaign, transported to japan:

"i'm rubbin' it!"

Anonymous said...

Why is my knee-fold the focal point of this picture? Where is my vagina?? Was this shot for knee-fold-fuckers monthly? I'm still twatastically hot, though...

Anonymous said...

Sex sells
Sex sells
So
A sexy salesman
Makes sense
And dollars

Anonymous said...

Who do you
Girl, who do you belong to?
My point of view
Girl, I think you’re hot

If we talked
What words could I describe
There’s no dictionary book
To explain how you look

Mr. James

Rocky Rococo said...

where is the baby oil that is omni present in the other HAGDJ posts. id say you were slipping... but theres nothing slippery about this

Snickerdoodles McPoppycock said...

Believe me, if I was the one art directing that photoshoot, she would've been drowning in baby oil. Sometimes you just gotta play the cards you're dealt... I'm not mad at it though.

Jim the Rza said...

"Jesus Christ, where is that motherfucker Jim aka the Rza? When I agreed to this open relationship, I thought he had maybe one or two other bitches on the side, not this whole fucking harem! Well if he brings them all over, I guess I won't be mad about the wait, in fact I should call him and suggest just that."

Rocky Rococo said...

i have to hand it to anyone living in elliot park, an area of minneapolis i have spent a large piece of my life living. the sun does not shine there, its 10 degrees colder than anywhere else in the city, and there is that special time of the day when all the drunks get released form the hospital.

ETC said...

This is important!
Mrs. Butter's worth it:

You are standing...
Before you sits Mrs. Butter
She is sitting on a pancake
You have both just began a plummet into the red hot depths of a very unhappy volcano

---

Come here
...............................&
contort upon my massive pancake
we descend fastly/surely - true - but ...
surely we fall slow enough for you to come and join me too.

It is soft _ and delicious _
are you familiar with Bisquick?
It does amazing things - Bisquick.

Have you brought the Blue Bonnet, or must we spread your Country Crock upon it? The pancake.

---


You decide to spend your last moments living on the falling pancake with Mrs. Butter.

You Land-o in a Lake of fire.
Mrs. Butter got hotter.