March 6, 2012

THE ASIANS ARE TAKING OVER

First it was Mr. Miyagi, then it was Jeremy Lin, now it's this lil' guy, -a 1-year-old baby drummer. I'm not positive, but I think this was the studio musician that the Beatles hired to re-record all of Ringo's tracks on Sgt. Peppers.

(Oh yeah; And Jackie Chan did his thing also.)

March 2, 2012

ASKEW/SMOKE SIGNALS

Askew: One of the most inspiring artists in the last decade! Congrats Big Els; good luck with the show!

ASKEW ONE - SMOKE SIGNALS SHOW from Askew One on Vimeo.

ANDREW BREITBART DEAD. GOOD RIDDANCE

When somebody dies, it's expected that you say a bunch of nice stuff about the person. As far as I could tell, Andrew Breitbart was a horrible, horrible, miserable cunt, who's life I can't really justify celebrating. The world is already  filled with enough loudmouth right-wing douchebags; I'm sure we'll manage somehow without this one. 

March 1, 2012

D Pound

I'm actually more confused than disgusted by this photo.  With the "#" in the wrong place, I don't know if this person is a the number one dick sucka, or if he/she only sucks one pound dicks. Is this a man or a woman? What does the other tattoo say? Jerry? Jerk? Why is this person wearing chain mail? What's up with those herpes lips? I'm so confused...

WAIT; SNUFFALUFFAGUS IS AN ALBINO NOW?

 My girlfriend typed this message into her cellphone in the middle of the night yesterday so that she wouldn't forget it: "Wait... Snuffaluffagus is an albino now??" She ended up showing me the question at dinner giving no context or explanation.  I had no idea what this meant or why she was showing it to me, but somehow the question seemed strangely familiar. What the fuck? -Snuffaluffagus is an albino?  Now? -As in he somehow randomly became one? I distinctly remembered him being a non-albino throughout my entire childhood. -What the fuck is she talking about?
According to her, I woke her up in the middle of the night, looked her dead in the eye, and without a hint of irony or jest, I demanded to know what Snuffaluffagus' current albino status is. Before she was even able to begin understanding the question, let alone answering it, I immediately went back to sleep.
Apparently, those are the types of thoughts that are going through my head while I am unconscious.

February 29, 2012

MOTHERFUCKING PETE WEBER: PRO BOWLER SWAG

This dude is a real piece of work...


WHITE BABY WEDNESDAYS!

It's official, I'm making White Baby Wednesdays an regular column on LOA, but I need your help.  Now I know what you're thinking: 'How can I get involved in White Baby Wednesdays?' Well it's actually quite simple. Keep a watchful eye out for white babies -they're everywhere. If you see one that's exceptionally creepy, snap a quick phone pic of it and send it to your boy Snickerdoodles at lordsofapathy@gmail.com .
Get it crackin!

February 28, 2012

PLEASE LET THIS BE REAL...

A feature film on the lyrical/ musical genius/ creator of the hip hop masterpiece "No More Tears To Cry"!?
 If anyone has any details on wether or not this actually exists/ how can I see it, -get at me.

(Good looking out Jared)

February 27, 2012

HORRIBLE RAP MONDAY: APOLOGY RAP EDITION

YOU WANNA BATTLE!?? -Well neither does this dude. Look, he feels really bad about that thing he did. So if you catch him slippin out in the streets, please,-PLEASE; we implore you; Please do not punch him in his face. He didn't mean to disrespect you guys. -He's really really really sorry.
Try to forgive him.

ARTILLERY x IRONLAK x NEW ORLEANS

WHITE BABY MONDAYS

Check out these heinous white babies:


 No Bueno...

LOA JAMS: HELL

Don't even front, this song is dope.

LOA ANIMAL SPOTLIGHT: HONEY BADGERS DONT GIVE A SHIT

MOUNT KIMBIE: NPR Music Tiny Desk Concert



THOSE FUCKING PIGS

Narrated by the late great George Carlin

February 25, 2012

THE YELLOW MAMBA pt. DEUX: 'LINNING'

Fellow *Oriental *Chinamen getting swept up in the Linsanity:
(Good looking out Joe F. Photo via the Arab Parrot)

*(Footnote: The words 'Oriental' and 'Chinamen' are not socially acceptable terms in present-day America. That being said, I think they are totally hillarious. Please incorporate them in your daily discourse.)

February 24, 2012

February 23, 2012

HORRIBLE RAP THURSDAY EVENING: RUSSIAN NEW JERSEY NETS OWNER STINKING UP THE M.I.C.

Why is it that EVERY SINGLE horrible amateur attempt at rapping always has this same flow: da-da-da, de-de-de, da-da-da, de-de-de, etc. etc? Somebody needs to come up with a few other alternative cadences for shitty non-rappers to rap in.

HORRIBLE RAP THURSDAY: DEEP THROAT BY JAYBO O.M.G

This man knows what he wants in life. No need for mincing words in this rap song. File under 'not very subtle at all'.

(Good looking out Black Squirrel Aliance.)

February 22, 2012

REAL TALK FROM SALOMAN


"except Ohio" ...well said.

KNEW IT...



DENGUE FEVER

Yeen know...

HOME BREW/ YELLOW SNOT FUNK

My homie Askew shot and edited this really dope video. Once again, the country you barely knew existed coming through with some really great work. Don't sleep on New Zealand!
Cheer bo!

February 20, 2012

JOSEPH STYLE: FAME O'CLOCK x MIAMI

Joseph, just on some elephant penis homie... (If you don't know you better axe somebody.)

50 CHARACTERS IN MIAMI from TheSeventhLetter on Vimeo.

February 19, 2012

Please Make It Stop

Congrats, whore.  You won the race to the bottom of increasingly dumber Lin puns.  I'm sure your dad is stoked.

JERSEY JOE: VANDAL-EYES

Anytime you see Jersey Joe, you know what time it is... (Fame O'clock)  

February 18, 2012

THE LIN-SANITY CONTINUES...

It takes balls or utter ignorance/ disregard for what is politically correct to actually make a sign that says "The Yellow Mamba" and hold it up in front of twenty thousand people at Madison Square garden. I'm not saying that it's not clever, because it is. This is totally something I would have said; -especially in front of one of my Asian friends.  I admire the 'fuckit-ness' of just making your sign and throwing it up for all the orientals and chinamen to see. I guess at least he had the decency not to hold up a sign saying "The YeRRow Mamba...


For more in racially charged signs, peep game.

ESPN is the Worst

Original headline was "Knicks Nipped" until ESPN realized Jeremy Lin's parents were from Taiwan.

February 17, 2012