July 21, 2009
Dude yeah, I was flipping channels today and saw this news show on CNN talking about medical marijuana and how they’re talking about taxing the sales of it to help pay for the California budget crisis, or whatever. All I know is they showed this 70-year-old hippie with braids scooping something labeled Burmese Cush out of an industrial-sized container like he was bagging up some granola at the grocery store. This shit was all gnarled up with all kinds of different blue and purple hairs protruding all over the place like a goddamn spirogyra. Dude, yeah, let me come up on some shit like that. I’ve gotten plenty of chicks naked off some regular-ass weed before, so I know if I had that Burmese shit I could step my game up to some Wilt Chamberlain-type shit, no problem. I mean, I’ve smoked a bunch of different crazy shit before, don’t get me wrong. I smoked some shit called Train Wreck that made me black out, fall down the steps and then have to get a bunch of stitches in my head, but it was nothing like this CNN weed. Then they were saying that LA has more of these medical marijuana places than Starbucks coffee shops. Yeah, how much is a plane ticket to LA? Are you kiddin’? I’ll be dancing the Makarenna and speaking in tongues. My buddy was saying that he smoked some crazy shit in Amsterdam that made him think he was dead. I’m not trying to get that bat shit-ass high. But if I get my hands on some of that LA, CNN weed I do plan on getting pretty super fucking high, though.