LORDS OF APATHY

January 21, 2009

CHUD OR NO CHUD?: JEWISH AMERICAN PRINCESS FROM THE CASH 4 GOLD COMMERCIAL

The true essence of' Chud or No Chud' lies in it's power to make us all dredge the depths of our sexual depravity. It makes us publicly confront the parameters of who we'd bone, in spite of subjecting yourself to the scorn and ridicule of your peers. In this regard, I think we all owe a huge debt of gratitude to former President Bill Clinton for bringing the issue of "chud-hopping" to the forefront of American consciousness. In the rich tradition of President Clinton and so many other unsung chud-fuckers, I ask that you join me in breaking down this week's Chud or No Chud challenge. (Click image to enlarge)

Selecting candidates for 'Chud or No Chud' is no easy task. It's a delicate balancing act weighing the traditional societal standards of beauty, against your own shameful sexual deviance. This week's candidate has been haunting me for a few months now. I'm not sure how this came about, but there's always been something about those annoying middle-aged whiny, J.A.P. broads that i'm feeling; -but the real decision lies with you. -All you have to do is go on the record and state where the Tax 4 Gold chick rates on our official chud rating system (see definition below). In order to get a better sense of what we're working with, I think It's best to see her within the context of the actual Cash 4 Gold commercial. If you want to skip ahead, her part is at the 0:36 second mark on the video.A few rules for your evaluation:
The chud-spectrum breaks down into 3 general categories: 1.Hot 2.Chud, and 3.Sub-Chud
• The Hot category is a no-brainer. Everyone and their dad would hit that. -Think Raquel Welch in the movie 'One Million Years B.C."
• In the Chud category, there's a glimmer of something there. You can't quite put your finger on what it is, but most likely you'd put your dick on what it is...-provided that shit stays on Downlow. -Think Sporty Spice.
• Sub-Chud is pretty self explanatory; It's not happening...-EVER. No way, no how. -Think Barbara Bush.

In the Comments section below, please leave your stance on where you think the Cash 4 Gold lady falls on the chud-spectrum, and site reasons for your decision. We will be scientifically compiling this data to come up with the official verdict as to weather or not she is indeed a chud or not. Good luck everybody!!

15 comments:

Unknown said...

As long as I'm wearing some gold on a rope from the swap meet/flea market,
it's a go!

PYSA - LTS - MSK

Anonymous said...

i wonder if she trades cash for pearl necklesses

boozin sarandon said...

^^hhahaahaha

Chef Rykwon said...

It would help if she were standing up in the office as opposed to sitting for me to make my judgement but I'm betting she's got rather short legs and a fat ass which makes for a foxxxy, albeit stumpy little knish. Going on this belief, I'm gonna say CHUD pushing hot with the hot being rather iffy. I love me a broad in hoop earrings and that was a bigger seller that her fraudulent tan. It's too cold most of the year on Strong Island for her to have gotten that bronzination the natural way. Also....her voice/accent is for some reason appealing. Maybe that's because I always wanted to fuck The Nanny.
So....yeah.....I'd fuck that in a minute, but no bitch gets my gold.

typoscura said...

hmmm...negatory.

the VELVET weed fog said...

been thinking on this for a few days, this one is a bit different... while old girl is semi attractive in an odd way, she lacks the star power that past CONCs have had, which leaves me with no real reason to even go there.

my vote? if she were more famous id say CHUD, but as it stands, i guess shes getting SUB CHUD as my vote based on her lack of real fame.

Anonymous said...

chud, because she's a JAP and needs a lesson in humility.

Emmanuel said...

I'm going to say marginal CHUD. Not seeing her body might definitely be working in favor of this one. Definitely on some Sporty Spice shit.

Anonymous said...

This looks like a girl I used to date. These girls can be surprise freaks. Also, I'd give her the benefit of the doubt on her body. Just divorced, she's probably trying to get back at her ex so there's probably been some treadmill in between manicures. I'm willing to roll the dice.

Anonymous said...

Hmmmm...hmmm...hmmm, this is no Mel C. So, we've got that out of the way. I'm with the Chef, it would help to see the whole package. I'd say it's a "go", but we're not going to date. I'm not so sure that the butt is going to be intact as you all think... she ain't 25, but she's no sub-chud either.

Anonymous said...

id put some gold balls in her culo!!

Anonymous said...

golddigger

Anonymous said...

rehdogg.com

Mike said...

tucker, youre tripping dog! i get hyped every time i see this commercial just because of her, long island milf = totally do-able

Unknown said...

yo SD, Esq.--we need a "Chud/No Chud" with that Millionaire Matchmaker chick. Throw some Ds on that!