ALEX RODRIGUEZ IS AN UNDERACHIEVER

I'm really not trying to be a hater here... I'm sure Cameron Diaz is a lovely person and all that; -but c'mon dude... Really?  When she was younger, she had a few glimmers of something resembling hot, but is this  the best you can do? Granted, this is a huge upgrade from your last boo, the 'crypt keeper' cougar Madonna, but is this really the example you want to be setting for kids? You're supposed to be a role model.  All I'm saying is, if I was a handsome, famous, multi-jillionaire, high-profile athlete, I'd think of significantly upping my dick game.  Holler at your boy Dereck Jeter (Who's literally 'batting' 1000 in this category)  and soccer guy Christiano Ronaldo.  Those motherfuckers don't play; -strictly dimepieces... Look, YOUR NICKNAME IS MOTHERFUCKING "A-ROD" for Christ's sake!!! -To me that means your 'Rod' needs to be exclusively reserved for 'A'-list ass. 

Just saying dude, get your shit together...

A quick side-note here: The above is a picture of Cameron shoveling popcorn into A-rod's failure-hole from the Superbowl yesterday. My girlfriend pointed out that Diaz looks exactly like Packers' Linebacker AJ Hawk:

HOW FUCKING CREEPY/ ACCURATE IS THAT?? I think ESPN needs to bring her on as an analyst for pointing out who NFL players resemble.  Her skills are impeccable!

HOT ASIAN GIRL DuJOUR: ASAMI TADA

You'd be hard-pressed to find a hotter, cuter girl than this. In fact, it kinda makes me sick even thinking about it. Why is it that in this country, they try and pass off straight-up chud-buckets like Drew Barrymore and Cameron Diaz as hot chicks; -meanwhile in other parts of the world there's girls 5X as hot shoveling donkey shit for a living... I dunno, I guess I'm just making that up. I have no evidence to support that last statement about the donkey shit. But my point is... ah... fuck it. Who cares anyways. The Packers lost and I'm just mad at the world I guess. Life sucks.
(Click images to perv in higher res.)

Cameron Diaz is the Opposite of Cute

I'm not sure what I'm more embarrassed to admit: that I spent the night on the couch eating banana pudding, or that I watched the MTV Movie Awards while doing it? Someone in MTV's legal department must have given the green light to use the words "dick," "balls" and "jizz" because seemingly every skit and MTV promo used them (edgy!). The Borat guy put his nuts in Eminem's face, Zac Efron tried to act like he wasn't gay and some other boring shit happened. I was about to put my spoon away and doze off, but when Cameron Diaz handed out an award, I momentarily thought I was looking death in the face. She is allegedly 36, but if you told me she was 56 I would believe you. The Manuel Noriega skin tone is the least of her problems. Can we please stop with the hoax that she is good looking?

CHUD OR NO CHUD?: KATE WINSLET EDITION

Welcome to round 2 of LOA's award-winning (/Josh Lazcano's favorite) gameshow 'Chud or No Chud'!! Based on the amount of responses left in the comments section of the last installment of 'Chud or No Chud', it proved to be one of LOA's most popular posts ever! In fact, the only other post to receive more comments was the one about Sanjaya's sister.
Basically, the point of this game is to try to separate the chuds from the non-chuds. For those of you who need a refresher on what the definition of a true chud is; -a 'chud' is a woman that is of questionable attractiveness, but despite her obvious physical flaws, you'd still be down to bone. The main determinant factor in a woman being a chud is not based on her perceived attractiveness, but rather, how ashamed you'd be to admit it to your friends. In this competition, you have to try to remove the 'famous factor' from the equation and evaluate her physical chudworthiness on it's own merits.(Click image to enlarge)
A few rules for your evaluation:
The chud-spectrum breaks down into 3 general categories: 1.Hot 2.Chud, and 3.Sub-Chud
• The Hot category is a no-brainer. Everyone and their dad would hit it. -Think Rosario Dawson.
• In the Chud category, there's a glimmer of something there. You can't quite put your finger on what it is, but most likely you'd put your dick on what it is...-provided that shit stays on Downlow. -Think Christina Ricci.
• Sub-Chud is pretty self explanatory; It's not happening...-EVER. No way, no how. -Think Kelly Osbourne.

In the Comments section below, please leave your stance on where you think Kate Winslet falls on the chud-spectrum and site reasons for your decision. We will be scientifically compiling this data to come up with the official verdict as to weather or not she is indeed a chud or not. Good luck contestants!!

CAMERON DIAZ; CHUD or NO CHUD?

Introducing LOA's new gameshow, 'Chud or No Chud'! Basically, the point of this game is to try to separate the chuds from the non-chuds. For those of you who need a refresher on what the definition of a true chud is; -a 'chud' is a woman that is of questionable attractiveness, but despite her obvious physical flaws, you'd still be down to bone. The main determinant factor in a woman being a chud is not based on her perceived attractiveness, but rather, how ashamed you'd be to admit it to your friends. In this competition, you have to try to remove the 'famous factor' from the equation and evaluate her physical chudworthiness on it's own merits. (Click image to enlarge)
A few rules for your evaluation:
The chud-spectrum breaks down into 3 general categories: 1.Hot 2.Chud, and 3.Sub-Chud
• The Hot category is a no-brainer. Everyone and their dad would hit it. -Think Jessica Alba.
• In the Chud category, there's a glimmer of something there. You can't quite put your finger on what it is, but most likely you'd put your dick on what it is...-provided that shit stays on Downlow. -Think Juliette Lewis.
• Sub-Chud is pretty self explanatory; It's not happening...-EVER. No way, no how. -Think Star Jones.

In the Comments section below, please leave your stance on where you think Cameron Diaz falls on the chud-spectrum and site reasons for your decision. We will be scientifically compiling this data to come up with the official verdict as to weather or not she is indeed a chud or not. Good luck contestants!!