January 30, 2010
MINOR SWING
Check out The Dixieland Gypsyband's cover of Django Reinhardt's dope song 'Minor Swing'. Motherfuckers are going ham on the solos...
January 29, 2010
VIOLENT FEMMES
I have nothing to substantiate this claim, but I am convinced the singer is a serial killer.
January 27, 2010
No Idea's Original
Sean Combs' Dirty Money (not to be confused with Lil Wayne's Young Money) hits all the right notes in this new banger:
Recycled Biggie verse? Check
Auto-tune singing? Yep
Black and white montage of images from projects? Uh-huh
Reuse of a Jay-Z beat? Yes!
There's a remix of this song which has a Rick Ross guest appearance, tramps counting money, fat dudes with duffle bags, luxury cars on Miami streets and some other stuff I've never seen in a rap video. Where does Puffy get all of these great ideas?!
Speaking of Puff, does anyone else find it unseemly that he donated $10,000 to Haiti at the same event he gave his son a $350,000 car?
January 26, 2010
Chi-Town Stand Up!!!
Stacey King is getting into the Broadcasting Hall of Fame with this call of the Dunk of the Year™. It's safe to say that history will only remember Goran Dragic for getting boomed on by Derrick Rose. Civic pride is finally running high right now.
While I'm here talking about sports, I'd like to send a shout out to all of those Vikes fans who sent me countless emails and text messages throughout the season about Jay Cutler throwing too many picks. Excuse me while I get Alanis Morissette on speed dial.
January 25, 2010
January 24, 2010
NEW LOA SCREENSAVER!
Enduring a season of Brett "Pants on the Ground" Favre playing for the Vikngs and sweeping my Packers was TOTALLY worth it! Especially considering the spectacular fashion in which he singlehandedly flushed their season down the toilet with his standard late-game interception; -snatching defeat from the jaws of certain victory. This might be just the dagger to drive Favre back into his 29th retirement. Yawn...
Romantic Getaway
I'm trying to get my Valentine's Day plans together and thought about taking my boo to Sybaris. Sybaris is a chain of
January 23, 2010
PANTS ON THE GROUND -REMIXXX!!
Somehow this song accidentally ended up being better than almost every song I hear on commercial radio these days. Somebody in the Dungeon Family get this dude a contract. -Good looking out on this one J-Bizzle.
January 22, 2010
CASUAL FRIDAY: GOLFER HAS ARM BITTEN OFF BY ALLIGATOR WHILE RETRIEVING BALL
BEAUFORT, S.C.: Officials say an alligator bit off part of a golfer's arm as he leaned over to pick up his ball at a private South Carolina course. The man, who is in his 70s, was retrieving his ball from a pond when the 10-foot alligator bit him at Ocean Creek Golf Course in Beaufort County. The gator pulled the golfer into the pond and ripped off his arm in the struggle. His golf partners were able to free him. Wildlife workers killed the alligator and retrieved the arm in the hopes it might be reattached.
The man has not been identified. He was being treated at the Medical University of South Carolina, but officials there would not release any information about him. A call to the golf course was not immediately returned.
Moral of the story: -DON'T PLAY GOLF! Playing golf is the most dangerous sport ever... When you're not getting your limbs bitten off by alligators, you're getting clubbed in the grill with 9-irons by your wife... Fuck all that.
(Good looking out Freightman)
The man has not been identified. He was being treated at the Medical University of South Carolina, but officials there would not release any information about him. A call to the golf course was not immediately returned.
Moral of the story: -DON'T PLAY GOLF! Playing golf is the most dangerous sport ever... When you're not getting your limbs bitten off by alligators, you're getting clubbed in the grill with 9-irons by your wife... Fuck all that.
(Good looking out Freightman)
BIRDMAN; FLY IN ANY WEATHER
No not Cash Money's 'Birdman', the "Brickey-tikki" Birdman from the Denver Nuggets (and Mattress King commercials)
January 21, 2010
SEASONS IN THE ABYSS
DOOD! Taco Bell's got a new Slayer Burrito! (I heard the secret ingredient is goat's blood.)
(Good looking out Playboy Mike 2600)
(Good looking out Playboy Mike 2600)
January 20, 2010
HORRIBLE RAP TUESDAY: MINI DADDY
A few short months ago i asked disgraced blogger Kid Lover "How come there's no fat little kids dressed in foiled-out Ed Hardy clothes doing reggaeton music?" and his response was "Because that simply just wouldn't work". Well, it will be plainly obvious after you watch this new Mini Daddy video, that he is eating those words as we speak. All I can say to him now is bon appetit motherfucker.
January 19, 2010
CANDID CAMERA BEATDOWN
If you're in the market for getting your ass whooped, fuck with this guy's whip.
NEUROSONICS AUDIOMEDICAL LABS INC.
One of the cooler music videos I've seen in recent years. Peep game:(Good looking out 'The Captain!')
January 18, 2010
GUANTANAMO BAY FOR CATS
Here's an invention created to piss off your cat. Don't be surprised if this motherfucker tries to blow up his little cat underwear on a plane a few weeks from now.
January 15, 2010
Words From The Genius
No shortage of well-reasoned explanations coming out of the tragedy in Haiti. First Pat Robertson blames the earthquake on Satan, and now Danny "I'm Gettin' Too Old For This Shit" Glover drops this gem:Case closed, folks. Either inadequate climate control treaties or global warming caused the earthquake. When an actor who appeared in "Saw 5" speaks, you can take his explanations about natural disasters to the motherfucking bank.“When we see what we did at the climate summit in Copenhagen, this is the response, this is what happens, you know what I’m saying?”
January 14, 2010
HOT ASIAN GIRL DuJOUR: PLOY CHERMARN BOONYASAK
French vanilla, butter pecan, chocolate delux. Even caramel sundaes is getting touched. Scooped in my icecream truck, (-who tears it up?)
January 13, 2010
2 WORDS FOR PAT ROBERTSON:
FUCK. OFF.
I can't wait 'til this dude dies. I hope it happens slowly and painfully over an agonizingly long period of time.
I can't wait 'til this dude dies. I hope it happens slowly and painfully over an agonizingly long period of time.
January 12, 2010
BOOTY POP!
I'm TOTALLY getting this a pair of 'Booty Pop©' undies (no homo)! -I was really beginning to feel insecure about how flat my ass looked wearing my leopard-print snuggie (no homo).
YA DOWN WIT P-R-P??
-Yeah you know me!
Fuck having a massive schlong. -That shit's played out homie... Having an average-size dick is where it's at in 2010. That and keeping on wearing skinny jeans.
Fuck having a massive schlong. -That shit's played out homie... Having an average-size dick is where it's at in 2010. That and keeping on wearing skinny jeans.
DUDE... I HAVE TO GET THIS GAME!!
Ever wondered what it must be like to have a billion dollars and bone every blonde thing that walks/ serves pancakes? -The wait is over!
HOT ASIAN GIRL DuJOUR: MAI NISHIDA
If I was Aaron Rodgers right now, I'd spend the entire offseason trying to figure out a way to impregnate* every girl who roughly looked like this:
(*-And by 'impregnate' I mean not actually get pregnant... Just bone chamber missions.)
(*-And by 'impregnate' I mean not actually get pregnant... Just bone chamber missions.)
January 11, 2010
Public Access
In the war for freedom of speech, there are no winners.
Freaky Deeky
Sunday 10-11pm CST on MTN 17 (minneapolis)
and online at livestream.com/mtnternet
Freaky Deeky
Sunday 10-11pm CST on MTN 17 (minneapolis)
and online at livestream.com/mtnternet
WHITE BABIES
This is gonna sound kindof fucked up and racist, but most of the time, I think white babies look creepy as fuck. I was talking to disgraced blogger Kid Lover about it a few weeks ago and he begrudgingly agreed with me. Now note, I'm not saying this about 'ALL' white babies, -I see some that are perfectly adorable. I'm just saying that most of the white babies I see look like horrible horrible little monsters. This isn't just some rant I'm formulating out of thin air, I've got mad data to support my findings. At one point, while waiting for a Connecting flight in Las Vegas I went like 9-for-9 on my theory. Nothing against them; I'm sure most of them will grow up and look perfectly normal, I'm just saying... White babies a lot of times look creepy to me.
HOT ASIAN GIRL DuJOUR: ASAMI TADA
You'd be hard-pressed to find a hotter, cuter girl than this. In fact, it kinda makes me sick even thinking about it. Why is it that in this country, they try and pass off straight-up chud-buckets like Drew Barrymore and Cameron Diaz as hot chicks; -meanwhile in other parts of the world there's girls 5X as hot shoveling donkey shit for a living... I dunno, I guess I'm just making that up. I have no evidence to support that last statement about the donkey shit. But my point is... ah... fuck it. Who cares anyways. The Packers lost and I'm just mad at the world I guess. Life sucks. 
(Click images to perv in higher res.)
(Click images to perv in higher res.)
January 9, 2010
JENNIFER KUROSAWA THONG SOCCER
I think this is exactly what's needed to make soccer a major (watchable) sport in the United States.
REVOK ON CHRIS BROWN
YOU'RE BUGGING CHRIS:
Whats the deal with Chris Brown and all of this “graffiti” buisness? -You’d think if you wanted to call your album “Graffiti” one would at least have the common sense to hire a actual graffiti writer to do the album cover… And the necklace!!! -Holy guacomole that shit is a tragedy playboy!!! Does Jacob do returns/exchanges? If he gives you a hard time plea temporary insanity… -Ive been doing graffiti for 20 years and i wouldnt be caught anywhere under any circumstances wearing that embarrassing monstrosity.
Holler at Revok's blog, there's always some good stuff going on there
Whats the deal with Chris Brown and all of this “graffiti” buisness? -You’d think if you wanted to call your album “Graffiti” one would at least have the common sense to hire a actual graffiti writer to do the album cover… And the necklace!!! -Holy guacomole that shit is a tragedy playboy!!! Does Jacob do returns/exchanges? If he gives you a hard time plea temporary insanity… -Ive been doing graffiti for 20 years and i wouldnt be caught anywhere under any circumstances wearing that embarrassing monstrosity.
Holler at Revok's blog, there's always some good stuff going on there
January 8, 2010
January 6, 2010
Nancy Pelosi is Your President
For those of you who have stopped following the laughable and labyrinthine healthcare "reform" process, the next step is to reconcile the Senate and House versions of the bill. These bills are very different and the negotiations will likely reveal who a lot about the people who are trying to make this happen.
During his campaign, Obama said that given the significance of this legislation, all Congressional negotiations pertaining to this bill will be televised on C-SPAN. House Speaker Nancy Pelosi is not having it, stating that all negotiations take place behind closed doors. Given that most of these people are controlled by lobbyists and that horrible deals will be cut (see, for example, Congress agreeing to pick up Nebraska's Medicaid tab FOREVER in exchange for a vote from Ben Nelson), I can understand why she would want to keep a lid on the proceedings. But what about Obama's promise? From wire sources:
A reporter reminded the San Francisco Democrat that in 2008, then-candidate Obama opined that all such negotiations be open to C-SPAN cameras.Pelosi's quote sums up where Obama is in Democratic pecking order. Can someone wake me up when Sandman Sims and Keyboard Cat dance these clowns off?
“There are a number of things he was for on the campaign trail,” quipped Pelosi, who has no intention of making the deliberations public.
I have a feeling that this will be my only political-themed post of the year. I'm losing the stomach for this shit. Expect only the finest in rap haikus, questionable racism analysis, and fine girls from DMD in 2010. Fuck politics.
January 5, 2010
FRAT GUIDO BROMANCE -MAC LETHAL
I know new years just happened last week, but this is by far the best concept song of 2010. You think you've seen some guidos in your lifetime, but this accompanying slideshow takes things to a whole other level. Some of these dudes are off the charts, coming up with skin colors never seen before outside of George Hamilton and John Boehner; -previously the two tannest white dudes on the planet. Time to step your game up fellas... (Good looking out Sista Nancy)
January 4, 2010
DUBAI DRIFT
Motherfuckers in Dubai really know how to party. Check out these fools going ham in the Range.
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